Elegance & Beauty

im getting more and more lazy to update this blog of mine.
so many things are going through in my mind right now and i do not know how to form them into words and sentences.
dun mind me, there won't be a flow in this entry cuz i'll just type down whatever that i can think of.

life is getting better and im beginning to pull through with the test God had put me up with.
the holy month of ramadhan has greatly helped me to be more patient and be wiser. whenever i feel like giving up, i stop and think. think abt the times when i really feel contented in life, think abt what i have learnt abt life, think abt my achievements in life, and think abt what i have and not have done in life. i realised that life is the most fragile gift given to us by God and we must not put that to a waste. i strongly believe that whatever happens in life, there's always a blessing in disguise. it is from all the troubles and hurdles that we've been/are going through in life which make us a much more stronger person in time to come. after all, what is life without obstacles?
whatever it is, do not lose hope for God is always at work in our lives to help us through with the difficulties that we're facing. to all my muslim friends, do make good use of this holy month of ramadhan to clear your mind and heart from any worries. DO NOT ever stop praying to God cuz once you do, there is no way that HE will help you through in whaever difficulties ure facing. this is what i always keep in mind : if i stop praying to God and forget abt HIM, HE too, will forget abt me and not bother to hear any of my cries.
well people, go search for ur inner peace. i am beginning to gain back the inner peace that i've lost. and i hope i won't let go of it again. *thank you Allah.*
you know, i kinda feel sad cuz the month of ramadhan is going to come to an end. and this makes me wonder. have i been good? have i been a better person? have i perform enough ibadah? have i done enough good deeds? is there any change in me yet? will i ever get the chance to meet the next ramadhan?
i really hope that for the last 10 days of ramadhan i'll work extra hard for Allah. it's ok if i aint one of the lucky souls to experience the night of Lailatul Qadar. but at least i know that my hard work will be paid off. insyaAllah.
all the best to you all people.

ok before i forget, here's a birthday shout out to my dearest fren, faizana ahmad.
HAPPY 18TH BIRHTDAY DEAR NANA!

.
may u have a blessed life surrounded with ur loved ones and may u succeed in whatever things that you do.
well, im glad to have such a great fren like you who'd tolerate all my nonsense and give me the chance to be someone whom u can trust. and im glad to say that our almost 12 yrs of friendship is not a waste at all. i've learnt alot of things from you. and for that, sincerely from the bottom of my heart i thank you for being such a good friend. ;) i'll always remember you in my prayers.

i have a confession to make. i miss my family. i really do. it's not that i dun get to see my family members everyday. yes, physically i do see them evryday. but i feel that there's something that's missing in the family. could it be the family bond? i guess so. time is different now. things changed. i missed those times when our family would spent alot of quality times together. we shared jokes, shared meals, we played games together, we went on outings together, watched tv together, and etcetera. now my siblings are all grown up and we tend to mind our own business. sometimes i do have the thought of doing something to gain back the bond. but i just don't have the power to do anything. all that i can do is to pray to God to make things better. i believe that one day, just one fine day, God will grant my wish. insyaAllah.

i think i want to change the skin of my blog. i want to start something new. i don't wish to blog about stuffs that are too personal anymore. i guess i shall do it on my free time.

i think that's all for now. take care everyone.

;)

Labels: peace

5:32 PM

school is starting pretty soon like as in 2 or 3 days more? and come to that, i have been thinking what have i been doing for the entire past 3 weeks of hols? these 3 weeks just feels like only 3 days. procrastination has been my true companion for the past weeks. i have promised myself like a thousand times to complete PP which has been left hanging in the middle of nowhere. well it seems that i always succumb to procrastination. arrgg.. how do i survive with this? i need HELP!
frankly speaking, i am NOT looking forward for school this coming sem. but then again i have vowed like a million times that i'll be a good girl for the coming sem. thanks to my 'hardwork' in previous sem that i failed my modules badly. this is not something to be proud of ok. i must learn to nurture a passion for IT to keep me going to school. motivation from friends is much needed and appreciated. hopefully i can endure just another 16 weeks of school. insyaAllah.
time pass fast. and speaking of which, i cant wait for the month of november to come by. 2 reasons why.
1st: submission of PP and done with it.
2nd: my mom has finally agreed to allow me to undergo facial treatment for my blemished skin. much yayness! i have been yearning to have that smooth and flawless skin which i used to have before hormones imbalance spoils it all. and i am tired of putting on make-up everytime i go out. actually i dun really fancy putting on make-up. i just don't feel right. it's just like im showcasing a fake face to people. i prefer to be natural. i very much appreciate natural beauty. i dun put on make-up to impress others, least to attract any random bloke. i do so to conceal the flaws and to at least look confident. hopefully after all the treatment process end, i don't have to worry about putting on make-up anymore when going out. ;D

ok guess im done.

happy fasting to all my muslim friends.;D let us all do good deeds in this holy month of ramadhan.

11:38 PM

life is pretty stressful right now. i am tired of handling everything in this life. i realised that i am no longer that happy-go-lucky girl who'd always curve a smile on her face every now and then. i am no longer that kind of girl who is able to handle things in an optimistic way. everything seems too excruciating to handle. life is now pure of black and white. i do not know what has come into me. every now and then i'd isolate myself from everyone and just be alone. loner. i am a loner. everynight i'd cry in bed to ease the pain. every night i'd pray that tomorrow will be better. and when morning comes i'd wish that i hadn't wake up at all. ive messed things up. just feel like giving up. nobody understands how i feel right now. im still searching for something that's missing in me. something that makes me understand the point of life. something that will bring back colors in my life. something that will calm me everytime im in pain or when im lost. something that makes me feel im worth living. i've yet to find that something. tell me how do i go about searching for that something?????????

Labels: something

9:44 PM